Side note: Angry post coming up. Read at your own risks. The descriptions/examples used may be found similar to real-life encounters, because they are indeed, REAL. If you found that this entry offends you in one way or more, congratulations, most probably I was referring to you. Those are just my not so humbe opinions after all, if you take it personally, it is your own fault.
Have you ever had conversations with some useless mindless
jerks that ticked you off so badly that you wish you have a hammer in your hand so you can smash the brains out of the person on the spot?
Not that it happens often, but I do get those undesirable chat encounters from time to time.
I know sometimes we can say certain things both intentionally, or non-intentionally that somewhat could hurt others even without realizing it. Certain people are sensitive over certain issues, they are like the hot buttons that, once you press all the right ones, the cage will be opened and the lion awakens and pounces out from the cage right on you, having your head in the mouth. Geez.. sometimes, people as innocent and sweet like me also kenak those unfortunate attacks before. Nevetheless, as far as my socializing with friends goes, I am usually not the one being ticked off.
I am not perfect, and of course, like normal guys, I do have my own hot buttons, that when you hit them, all sorts of torture from hell will be inflicted on you mercilessly. Alright, I am not so brutally cruel lar, I would do all I can to hold back the beast inside me, but if you are asking for it, you might get what you wish for if you are lucky enough.
Here is a list of what-tick-me-off/the hot buttons.
1) Everyone has their own opinion.
As much truth as there is to that statement, if used at the wrong time and at the wrong place, can wreck havoc, especially if I am around. Imagine, when a person started a discussion, and you start giving your humble opinion, and sharing your precious knowledge, what you have experienced, and your feelings to make your point, even if you disagree with the person, but you kindly state your reasons. And the person just fire right back at you.. "aiya, its oklar, everyone thinks differently, everyone has their own takes on life, it depends lar"
KECELAKAAN BESAR !!!
I know everyone has their own perceptions and their own ideas. Blardy hell.. WHO DOESNT ALREADY KNOW THAT ???? Hello?? What is a discussion if I am not allowed to voice my views? And what is worse, I was talking, and my part of contribution is not being appreciated, and rapidly brushed off by that "everyone has their own opinion" crap. If you have something to say, I sure am more than willing to listen to what you have to say. To me, it is because everyone has their own opinion that everyone SHOULD say something !! It is just inappropriate and a very, very shallow excuse to shut someone up.
Bottomline, if you are not ready for a heavy discussion, talk on something lighter. Don't start a topic if you are not expecting a follow through. If you want to ask me something, or want my opinion, have the decency to LISTEN to what I have to say.
2) Just kidding
This is another major tick-off. There are certain groups of people who define humor by sarcasm. Sarcasm can simply mean, implying insults in the form of multiple meanings, and this is commonly mixed with the jokes casually brewed up in ordinary conversations. I am generally ok if someone is trying to joke sarcastically with me, even if they really do mean to insult me. I have very high level of tolerance when it comes to insults and heart-piercing words thrown at me. But what I cannot tolerate is...
When I joke back in sarcasm, people shoot back at me... "aiyaa... Just kidding lar, don't get mad ok? Just joking only lar, why are you being so serious?"
TULAN BABI HUTAN !!!!
You can talk sarcastic to me, and I can't say anything in return is it? I am just supposed to swallow everything inside and just keep quiet? For goodness sake, if you want to joke with me, just joke all the way !! I can laugh at the jokes, and I am expecting the same at your end. Now who is the one being serious and not being able to take jokes? I know I can be sharp and gruesome with my jokes, but what hits back at you will be nothing else than what you have hit me first.
Sheeeeessshhh, if you do not want to be insulted back sarcastically, do not start the joke. If you start joking, just joke and laugh all the way, and have fun doing that, with no hard feelings taken. It can be fun, I agree, if both ends agree that there was nothing serious to the few rounds of harmless jokes. It all only ends, and turns for the sour side, when someone started to say "don't get mad ok? its only a joke".
BLARDY HELL !! Like they think I am already insulted. Be warned that my subsequent jokes will not be so pleasant after that.
3) I feel lazy
Some people can appear to be so unenthusiastic when you ask them for a favor, or out for a hang-out session. This time, lets have a descriptive scenario to better illustrate the message that I am sending through. Imagine that you have travelled far halfway across the world, and when you arrive at the destination, you just could not wait and really eager in anticipation of wanting to meet up with one of your long lost good buddies from old times. You have so much excitement to see what has your friend become, and all the stories to share, and missing laughters to catch up with. You give the person a call, asking if he wants to meet up for coffee of grab lunch or something. And the person replies "Errmm, aiya, I am free today, not doing anything, but I just feel lazy lah. Some other time ya? Just don't feel like going out"
Don't feel like going out MY FOOT ON YOUR HEAD lah !!!!
WHAT THE BANANA IS THIS??? I traveled so far, and I was so excited to see you, and you just say.. you are lazy and don't feel like meeting me??
YOU CAN GO TO HELL AND DIE DOT COM !!!
Maybe I should not expect as much enthusiam on the other end of the conversation, but still, having turned down with the reason being lazy and not feel like it... is just plain hurtful. I may not be able to respect your open honesty, but if you seriously think the friendship means something, you should at least show some effort to patch things up, and sound more pleasant.
Of course, the list can go on a little further which would be rather unnecessary. Although these hot buttons have been pushed from time to time, I still try to do my best to remain calm, and not letting anger to take control of my thoughts. It can be very challenging and hurtful at times, but I guess nothing ugly has ever happened in my history of conversations so far. Everything is under control up to this point. It can feel like someone is poking my balls with a giant needle, I curse and scream and yell all I can from the inside, but just pass things by with a wide, wide smile from the outside. And maybe hoping I could forgive that person later.
You may say that those things (the hot buttons) are insignificant in comparison with other more prominent "hot buttons" like sexually harrassing talks, making fun of the height and weight of others or many more flamingly intimidating ones. But it is crucial to know your hot buttons, and know them well, to better navigate yourself out of the rough waters. People may throw knives and arrows from all directions, but knowing the directions in advanced, you have higher advantage of dodging them and not getting hurt.
Uundeniably, no one wants to be insulted in anyway. Don't worry, I am still as innocent and sweet as ever.