Friday, April 07, 2006



I finished, its over.. I've got a degree in my hands !! Muahahahaa...

Ok, that bit didnt work out quite well, I know, since April fool is way over by now, but what the heck, just for the fun of it. It was the graduation ceremony for UWA engineering faculty last nite, and I went, NOT BECAUSE I GRADUATED, but mainly just to have a feel on how graduation is going to be like for me. Lame, no?

In truth, I am one semester away from graduating.

My university holds two graduation ceremonies every year, during autumn and spring. The Autumn graduation ceremony was just over, and I, as usual would roam around the place with my camera like I had nothing better to do, and snap pictures of whatever I saw.


The graduation ceremony was held at the grand Winthrop Hall in UWA. Of course, one must be officially invited to participate in the event. As for a wandering soul like me, like many others I waited outside the hall in the cold winter Autumn night for the ceremony to end, so people would come out from the hall into the lawn in front for food and refreshments. Ok, I guess anyone could figured that out easily, there was free food alright and I was first in line


I got there rather early, while waiting for the food to be served the ceremony to end, I had some time thinking to myself and reflecting back my past two years here in Perth, and the university. Questions started to flow in from God-knows-where. Innocent yet troubling questions.

Questions like, how the heck are my balls still the same size as before while Kenny Sia has his balls inflated to the size of coconuts over the years in Perth?

OK, that was a bit off, but what I really was thinking back there, how did my life come to this? Why am I in Perth? I know I am here to do my degree, which means ultimately everything will end on grauation day. But seriously, is there more than just a piece of paper? More importantly, how would I feel about my coming graduation?

As odd as this may sound, I do not look forward to my graduation at all. I just feel that there is still something left unfinished. There is no sense of accomplishment yet. I do not know how to fit everything in words. I know somehow, somewhere, things have gone terribly wrong, and I have not the power to mend the broken pieces. Yet, I still go on, with the hurt and pain that no one sees or cares. I guess the point is, after all I have been through up to this point, graduation does not seem to be a celebration worth compensating all the losses counted over the years.


To some people, graduation is a milestone in their life, a success to be taken with much pride and contentment. To some people, graduation may be just the next best thing after wedding. To some people, graduation marks the end of suffering and torment in university life, and a chance to move on to a realistic world or careers. Well, I guess being there after last night, seeing all the people dressed up in their gleaming graduation gowns, taking pictures, congratulating each other getting drunk on alcohol and laughing, chatting away, it hit me really hard that I am now, standing at the wrong place, at the very wrong time, and going to the very wrong direction in my life. This is not what I want to do. This is not where I want to be. This was not how I saw myself to be from the beginning. Somehow, I had no choice, but to move on. No matter how hard it is, I have to move on.

And the background music plays, "my heart will go on.. and on...." by Celine Dion.... kehkehkehkehkeh...

I can say I find my life rather sad and full of brokenness, but that may not be entirely true, since I do have my good and beautiful times all the way up till now. I know I should be thankful on a lot of things, and truly look back on the wonderful blessings I have received. I know I should stop looking back, stop complaining, and try to look forward instead. I know there is just one road, and though I am walking the wrong one, I can still find joy, strength and hope in it. I will graduate soon, and from there on, I hope life will take a turn to a better direction.

So, who wants to come for my graduation next semester?


  1. hey sigma,
    i am doing civil engineering.

  2. You don't like engineering? *confused*

    But you know what? Nobody says that you need to be a slave to a piece of fancy paper. :) People seldom end up working what they'd studied. Take me for example. I studied Comp Sci and now I'm in business.

    You find yourself on the wrong path, *make* your own path.

  3. hey luxferi,
    in the process of making my own path now.. ahhahaa
    thanks for the advise, well, it isnt so bad, ahhahaa.. but engineering do not fit who I am that well.

  4. Who would you say you're more like then? And, if you had a choice and you can change your studies now, what would you pursue instead? Sorry for the questions, but I'm real curious.

  5. hey luxferi,
    I would have gone for law, or psychology instead. One of the things i wanted to try out in my lifetime is definitely radio Deejaying.
    I just want to do something that involves speaking and interacting with people. Teaching is under consideration as well.

  6. graduation ceremonies have got to be the most boring ceremony of ceremonies, i literally fell asleep in my brother's years ago!

  7. hey wuching,
    ahahhaa.. thank God I was not in the ceremony that night, hahahaa..

  8. OI how come got yoong tau foo one??? for graduation???????

  9. hey chin kian,
    i dun think that is yong tofu lar... ahaha.. looks like yong tofu ya?

  10. i'll go i'll go. but bo lui worh. =P

    my graduation is so close that i can taste it already! even before getting out of college, i am already beyond thrilled about university life. =)

  11. hey chloe,
    yeah, i guess there was a time for me too back then when I was so eager to jump into uni from college. Ah.. looking back those memories...

  12. huh?
    why congra? i am not graduating just yet.

  13. All the best to you. Just do whatever you think it's good for you. There are heaps to learn. :) Just make sure u don't do something wrong and ended up in jail is enough LOL...

  14. hey irene,
    thanks a lot !! prison is the last thing in my mind now.

  15. Even better, after you graduate, get yourself a cheap Virgin blue flight to Sydney and we'll host you for a NSW a gradutioan present!

    Talk about confusion?
    I did a Bach. of Built Env-Architecture studies then, did a Grad Dip in Communication-Fundraising, worked in as a wholesale Op Manager, organised seminars, work nights as a translator then later ended up as a Credits Officer for HSBC. My biggest achievement thus far is unpaid, long hours but loads of rewards- being a MOM! PTL!

  16. hey chan gang,
    yeah !! I guess sometimes life is just too mysterious. and being a parent is simply priceless !!!
    Will definitely consider going to sydney after graduation !! hahaha..

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